Often times in life we cross devistating heart-ache, sometimes we are ever so lucky to make amends. Very seldom do we ever forget the anguish experienced from a broken heart. A bad relationship often leads to mistrust in new relationships. Often times after I have been dumped by women, they have came to me with "Lets remain friends," I always thought that was a clever approach for the woman to continue breaking my heart.

As some of you may know, a few months ago I went through a bad break-up, but I did not go through the break-up process. Nobody said it was over; there was a failure to communicate. The woman, who was my girlfriend at the time, completely cut me out of her life, she would not talk to me at all. I was left with so many questions: what did I do wrong, am I not good enough for her, is there another man, and why did she tell me that she loved me if she will not talk to me now. My mind was just racing with questions and it drove me crazy, which lead to me saying hurtful things out of the pain I felt.

Yesterday (06.19.08), my ex-girlfriend instant messaged me under a screen name that I did not recognize. She finally explained to me what happened: her grandfather was dying, her mother had cancer, and she thought she was being kicked out of her home. She was under a lot of stress and explained that how she handled things with me is just how she handles things, "Ryan, you have to realize that I am independent," she said to me. I was confused about what being independent had to do with us for I was not trying to pay her bills, but that is beside the point. She told me that she could never forget the things that I had said to her when all of this came crashing down. I explained that the way she handled it had crushed me, that what I said was out of hurt, therefore I felt that we were even. After talking to her for the first time in a few months, I felt that the weight of the world had been taken off my shoulders; I was relieved. For the first time in my life, it was me, who made the approach with "Lets remain friends."